hasstily written jazz fanfic
 

everyone post their own chapters no effort allowed please add your character

"Hey Jazz who should we go kill/save today?" said KRSplat while hunched over his computer at 4:35 PM in Carrotus. Splat was a dude-bunny with blue fur and carried a bright, sparkly orange gun, which shot purple acid raindrop bullets, along with virtually any other type of ammo that can be found around the universe. He wore a fitted yellow L.A.Lakers cap with holes for the ears.

"Dunno.. wait actually no.. Spaz is calling." King Jazz Jackrabbit answered his phone which spoke in Comic Sans.

"Hello Spaz"

"Hi Jazz we have some lizards to fight"

"OK Lets Go get em comeone Splat !"

to be continued

unfortunately many of the lizards what they had to fight were very fearsome and had big teeth dripping with preserved rabbit blood from a tin

one of the teeth of one of the largest lizards was named Craig Silverston (because he was a silver tooth) and he had a big family of white horses that sometimes tromped and sometimes stood still and sometimes did something else

Craig had very few dreams and aspirations but he liked to chew things over

Jazz shot Craig in the himself and there was a lot of blood

Jazz came over to SPaz and said "Spaz my socks are lost"
and Spaz said "yo never wore socks"

so Jazz hgot mad and banished Spaz in to the dungeon where many bad things happen iad lifes are lost and those who disyobe have to clear the whole castle clean

in the mean time Devan who was a brave evil wariior sough to destroy everything but his planet that he loves so much

Devan came up wuith a dwevice ath would eat onion and then spew at opeole so they would choke and die

unforutnale ly Devan was interupted by a balst which blew up his door and somebody comed in and said in deep voice

"I am you're end"

Devan said Jazz your socks are hot.
"No they're not," Spaz said as he shot.
Devan laughed.
Spaz snickered.
"No, really. I just lost my socks. Jazz's aren't as cool as mine, kid. :-#"

Suddenly there was a tap on the door. It dispensed orange juice. That floored them.

By the time they'd picked themselves up Devan had gone off to ransack Philadelphia. Sadly, he was no good at running so he only got three bags full.

Meanwhile Spaz had new socks. Jazz was green with envy, red with rage and yellow with Lori. To temper this he took something for it. It was fifty bucks from the till and he wasn't allowed in the War Tavern anymore.

All of the sudden a trap door opened and out stepped a fruity, little rhinoceros.
"A round of ale for my friends, for we have much to celebrate."

He had just finished building a large hadron collider in the basement out of toothpicks and used tissues.

"Activate plot twist!!!" The large hardon collidor started humming, soon the world would be swallowed by a massive black hole...

"Oh boy." said Spazz.
"Oh no!" said Jazz.
Not too soon but not too late, a bird got stuck in the hardon collidor, halting its continous humming.
"QUACKK!" it said, the bird.
"I AM FROM THE FUTURE, I AM HERE TO PROTECT YOU FROM KNOWLEDGE OF BLACK HOLES!"

Angry at his bashed plot twist, The SlaYeR's Id soon flooded the story with angry anger.
"I AM THE GOD OF THIS STORY NOW, AND THE BLACK HOLE SHALL COMMENCE.", he said.

Spaz farted. Jazz chuckled, realizing that the black hole was, in fact, a reference to Spaz's anus.

As the fart dispersed through the air, it immediately transformed the entire environment, atom by atom, into a giant rabbit disco party, which eventually spread throughout the entire Jazz Jackrabbit canon universe.

every body was hapy and danced and there was a discoboll up ahead in teh sky it shined a thousand shines like the sun. they danced over quicky though becouse the world was stiff unsale from the treath of Devan who taked the oporutnity that every body forgot him and where he was. becouse where he was was danger that needed to be stopped.

the magical colorbeams from the discosky pointed Jazz toward devans secret location. but as our bunny heroes approached the central castle, the sky began turning dark and cloudy as if to signify the presence of an overpowering evil...

spaz pulled out 6-foot glass bong. c3. "NEED BACKUP!" c1 "AFFIRMATIVE!" jazz pulled out a lighter and lit the bong while spaz filled the bong up with thick smoke. x1 "GO, GO, GO!" jazz pulled the bowl out off the bong and spaz cleared the bong like a champ. oh yeah evil wha?

(the sky instantly cleared up and there was a rainbow visible btw)
the castle had a neon sign that said "Claudia's Clitrageous Castle"

and it was not long until jazz plugged a

new and upcoming artist. he then took some XTC, ain't no telling what the side effects might be!

The side effects were death. Death, and an addiction to strawberries.

Devan's strawberry factory then went on to harvest on Strawberria.
After respawning, Jazz took a late night intergalactic train to catch up with Devan. Spazz didn't have any money so Jazz hid him in his backpack.

Then in the rain they were and there was ticket checking man who was at urtle. He comed to Jazz and said "I need you're ticket" and Jazz said "I can't give you my ticket" and the turtle said"WHY" and Jazz said "becouse you are a turtle!!!" and shot him in the head and blood splatered evrywhere! then Jazz and Spaz laughed and Spaz said "good job bro" and gave him a patt on theback.

being bros jazz and spaz celebrated their victory in a bar and had some drinks and then went home to sleep off because it had been a long day. but no sleep for our heroes! suddenly a tutrle entered the room and started shooting and he hit spaz, jazz then shot the turtle and rushed spaz to a hospital.

But it was too late and complications set in. He developed brain fever and the doctors had to amputate. The only thing that saved him in the end was the author getting bored and not finishing this post.

Jazz and Eva and Lori went to a funeral for Spaz the next day. But got lost and went to the national firearms museum instead. This turned out to be a very dangerous place because everyone was packing heat!

So the rabbits began to profit from drug sales, violent extortion, and terrorism

And thus they lived.

Sometimes however they did not.

And this was a triumph, a huge success. Everyone was satisfied, except the ones who were dead. But there's no point crying over every mistake.

In the palce where they did evil doings things there was a rabbit named Jose. Jose was addicted to crack and asked then always of it when they were that he wanted some but he had mo noney and they dint like him for that. Jose was angry and sad and one day he comed to Spaz's grave and had a magic book of spells. He opened it and read a spell that no one could ever understand then said "Spaz, you are the demons."

And then Spaz was a zombie.

Jose ate the zombieSpaz