Just walking around can get boring, too.

Examine exits and surroundings.

There was a canadian guy with an alien on his head. The exit to the north lead to the bakery. The exit to the west lead to more roads. The exit to the east lead to the hotel. I forgot where the exit south went to.

Ask the alien why he is wearing a Canadian the wrong way up.

Lol.

Walk into the hotel, and examine the everything.

I walked into the hotel. It did not seem to contain everything.

Warp to Pandora's Island with Faw. Then go east and ask the Canadian guy if he has any money we could borrow. Especially one Canadian dollar.

"Follow me... to MONIES!" with that memorable quip, I teleported with Faw to Pandora's island and we walked to the collapsed fort.
Getting there, I saw that Araches had awakened. I, ignoring her, tapped the canadian guy on the back. "Do you have a canadian dollar I can have?"
Araches clapped, and said, "Brilliant! Asking a canadian man for a canadian dollar! I'm glad you were so quick in figuring out where to get that last dollar!"
I'm glad she was so supportive. The canadian man looked at me a little dubiously. "Well, I guess since you did save my life and all I might as well. As long as you don't try and drag me to certain death against dark lord Blackraptor, again."
I considered that for a moment.

Ask Araches why she just didn't get the dollar herself instead of relying on a person with the puzzle solving abilities of a lobotomy patient. After hearing her explanation, warp to SuperUberMegaTropolis with Faw and Shuri. Ask them to make sure Uberbob does nothing stupid with the Pie. Go north into the bakery. Ask the Bakery Knight what the U.P. does.

Hey, maybe we should also ask the Canadian about being worn by the alien the wrong way up?

Definitely.

Also dance.

I decided to start ignoring the canadian guy, and instead talk to Araches. "Araches, if it was so obvious why didn't you do it?"
"You were ignoring me when I told you to do it, and the canadian guy wouldn't take me on my word that I was acting on your authority."
"Oh. Go on not having my authority, then."
I slapped Shuri awake and teleported with her and Faw back to SuperUberUltraMegatropolis.
"Hey, people. Make sure Uberbob doesn't do anything stupid with the pie."
Faw, the more awake of the two, quickly made the connection. "You are going to buy it? But you never took the canadian dolla-"
"No time for chit chat, old chum!"
I ran to the bakery, with Faw and a now-awake Shuri following me.
The baker man didn't even look up on my arrival. "What does the ultimate pie do?"
He perked up at the implied chance of getting money. "Well, it's a pie. You eat it. It tastes good. And then you go and brag to all your rich friends at how you just ate a pie that cost ten billion and one dollars."
I ran backwards out of the room and was about to say something witty to the canadian guy outside before tripping on a rock and landed on my head.
However, in an amazing move I used my momentum to spin and break into a BREAKDANCE.
Shuri walked up to me and kicked me over. I got up, and tried to remember what quip I was going to give. "Oy, Canadian guy! You are wearing that alien on your wrong face!"
"What?"
"I don't know. It seemed to almost be the right thing to say at the time."

Originally Posted by YOU

I slapped Shuri...

Now how is Uberbob supposed to marry Shuri? >O

Realize something has gone wrong, ask Faw + Shuri to wait, warp to Pandora's Island, go east, ask the Canadian Guy for the dollar. This time wait until the dollar is obtained, then go back to SuperUberPlace. Go north and buy the Ultimate Pie. Attempt to buy the Pie for free, and before the BakerKnight can respond, offer the money as currency.

uhh why didnt we take the dollar? ;O

Don't ask them to wait, take them with you; they might end up at the Acedemy again.

"Hey, people, in all my brilliance I realized I forgot to take the dollar. Not like any of you helped."
Shuri gave me a dark look, but said nothing. I wonder why.
I teleported us back to Pandora's Island and ran east. I grabbed the dollar out of the canadian guy's hand, slapped him on the back, and teleported back to SuperUberUltraMegatropolis. To my surprise, he appeared along with me, Faw, and Shuri. "I thought you didn't want to come with my party."
"I don't. I just hitched a lift, so to speak."
I felt that was a logical enough answer, so I let him leave.
I went back to the bakery, and took out my money.
"Hey, Bakerknight!"
Nobody responded.
"Hey, Baker person!"
Still no response.
"Hey, I want to buy a pie!"
The bakerknight shrugged, and opened the register. "Alright. That money you have there is just enough for an ultimate pie."
Wow, he could tell how much money I was holding from a distance!
Trying not to look impressed, I responded, "Well, I guess it is. But I want to buy your ultimate pie for free."
"No."
"Why not? Why can't I buy it for the universal currency of poverty?"
"Why not?" he mocked me, "Because I'm the one with the broadsword."
"Oh. How about I buy it for free, with this money as currency?"
"What?"
"I don't know. That's what the voices told me to do."
Shuri sighed and took the money out of my hands, walked up to the baker, and gave it to him. He gave her an ultimate pie. She walked back to me.

Tell her she can hold it, and warp the Party to Pandora's Isle, go East and grab Araches, and warp the Party to Upper Placespot. Walk in the direction of the Ice Smith.

Be glad about the fact that there seem to be no mental insistutions in this world.

I shuffled over to Shuri and whispered in her ear, "tell her she can have it."
With that I teleported us to Pandora's Island. I ran east, with Shuri and Faw following me, and grabbed Araches. Araches wrenched herself free and motioned to Shuri, who proceeded to kick me.
After she stopped, I got up. No time to think about things like pain! I teleported the party to Upper Placespot. After a bit of sliding, I took stock. Araches still looked angry, Shuri's foot was covered in blood, presumably mine, Faw was looking for butterflies, and L33tz4n was invisible. Or, at least, I presumed she was invisible because I couldn't see her there.
I walked the party south, to the icesmith. When I got there, he his forge out and was hammering a lump of ice into a swordblade.

Offer to trade the Ultimate Pie for his Ice Tools, ask which way to go to get above the Magic Academy, and if he has anything else to trade.

"Here, I have a pie."
"A pie? What flavor?"
"I dunno. Maybe it tastes like ultimates."
"Eh, I'm not picky. What was it you wanted?"
"Your carving tools."
I handed him the pie, and he walked into his blacksmithy. I wondered, for a moment, if blacksmithies are for metal, wouldn't an ice smith have a whitesmithy? This occupied me till he came back out with his carving tools, and handed them to me.
"Do you have anything else to trade?" I asked him.
"You could buy some of my wares, but I doubt you will have the money or the need for iceswords."
"Oh. Which way is the magic academy?"
"Err, it should be northwest from here."

Ask him to tell us about everything about ice swords.

"Tell us everything about ice swords."
He looked at me in a funny way for a moment, then went on. "Ice swords are swords. Made of ice. Or do you want me to define 'ice' and 'sword' as well?"

Not so bold now, are we? Haw. Haw. Haw.

It was an error anyone could have made D=

"Not so bold now, eh?"
"What?"
"I don't know. It just seemed like the thing to say at the time."

Oh. I thought ice swords were Ice Swords and had something to do with freezing stuff when struck.

"Examine the carving tools."

The carving tools were sharp things made for carving ice. They looked surprisingly sturdy, and were probably enchanted in some way. If you stuck one into a wall and hung a grand piano from it, it would be the wall that breaks first.

Head off to the Northeast, and chisel into the ice nearest to the academy. Try and look for the white thing that is in front of the window.

I walked northeast and straight into the huge cliff of debris under Upper Placespot.

Before chiselling with the carving tools, examine debris and find out just how huge and high it is.
(What and where is Upper Placespot?)

Inventory check

Oh, and if anybody wants to know, I'm not DM anymore. My authority ended when you got the carving tools, actually. I'm hoping that if everybody knows it will galvanize Radium to action.

*kickstarts Radium*

*kicked by Copper*
Oh.. right. Radium's back, kids!



Okay, it was really, really cold. Imagine standing outside in January wearing nothing but boots, gloves, and two pieces of duct tape - only the duct tape is actually expensive looking fabric with some sparkly parts presumably of magical significance, and the January is actually a magically frozen chasm in the middle of the ocean.
But oh so luckily, we were under the leadership of the mighty Uberbob! The gray rabbit, seemingly unbothered by the cold (possibly due to this wonderful invention called “pants” which they never give to sorceresses) was leaning over the heap of icy debris at the base of the cliff. “Debris…” he spoke mysteriously, “spelled curiously French for such a simple concept, don’t you agree?” He turned to Fawriel, who was still clutching the first-aid kit. Uberbob had previously given the kit to me and asked me to keep it safe. A bit later he took it and gave it to Fawriel, requesting the same thing. He was more obsessed with that particular item than anything else we have encountered. Well, maybe with the exception of my clothing and how he could get it away from my body.
The green weasel was perplexed by Uberbob’s comment. He shifted the first-aid kit uneasily, looking for a visual cue and finding none. “Um… Yes?” he tried.
“Precisely!” the rabbit exclaimed slamming his robotic fist down on one of the blocks of ice, snapping the mechanical limb in two. “And wouldn’t you say this cliff is approximately 354 and one half feet tall? L33tz4n, convert to metric so Faw knows what I’m saying.”
Not surprisingly, he had forgotten L33tz4n entirely and left her at the ruins. There was this long silence while he waited for a response, maybe thinking she would hear him and come to his aid. Not wanting to spend all day watching frost appear on my fur, I did a quick estimate. “’Bout 100 meters,” I choked out over my shivering.
“You’re not L33tz4n, you can’t be smart,” Our mighty leader responded matter-of-factly. As he darkly glared at the cliff before us, I briefly considered casting a fireball spell on myself to avoid freezing to death. Then, suddenly appearing to be in a much lighter mood (than usual, even!), the rabbit unloaded all the random objects from his pockets onto the ground and began narrating everything he had.
“Inventory

” he explained with mediocre HTML formatting. “I have to ask the voices what to do now. Stand by please.” Then he stopped moving and, apparently, thinking.
I took off my hat and wrapped it around my shoulders for warmth while Uberbob mentally idled. The path through the ice went to the west and to the south, and the icy cliff below Upper Placespot towered above us.

Oh, and it might help you to know Araches is narrating there. I just noticed that after Rad logged off D=

Give the map to Fawriel; order him to teleport back for L33tz4n, and to go west from the current position when they get back. Go west.

Or just let Faw Townpipe there (I assume he can still do that).

Yeah, I just wanted the 1000th post. And welcome back DM Rad! =D

I got the 1000th reply. Muahaha!
And do what Dev says.
In general.
Well, in general in this game.

Pacelame.