"What? What is it?" Elias asked, wondering what Ducky and some of the others were viewing.

"Get a load of this!" Ducky exclaimed, pointing into the viewfinder of the camcorder.

Elias looked and was immediatly shocked by what was going on. "Is this what you were trying to warn us about, Toxic?!"

"Um, yeah. I tried telling you all about it earlier, but I was ignored like I didn't even exist!"

"Sorry about that. Brawls in the tavern have a habit of taking over everything else."

"So I've noticed."

"So what's the deal?" Jack queried.

(OoC: Happy, 4I? I used Jack instead of Flash.)

"In case you forgot, it turns out that there is going to be an office complex built right next to this tavern. The worst part about it is, they aren't happy with the amount of space they have to work with, and are therefore trying to get the tavern shut down so they can buy the property and demolish it," Toxic explained.

"Oh, man... I wish you were joking, but with evidence like this, it's hard NOT to believe you!" Ducky stated.

"Yeah, this truly is a bummer," Elias replied.

Just then, something caught Elias's attention. "Hey! How do I rewind this thing?!"

"Just press this button right here," Toxic replied, pointing to a blue button marked REWIND. "Then press the green PLAY button next to it to play back what you rewound. To pause it, just press the yellow button."

"Thanks."

Elias rewound the tape to a certain part, just before the camera's view rotated to the left. He played it for a brief moment, then paused it as it zoomed in on something. "There! Can you see it?!" he queried, removing his eye from the viewfinder.

"See what? The image is all blurry," Ducky replied.

"Hang on. I can fix that easily," Toxic stated.

A few button presses later, the image had sharpened enough to see it clearly. What they saw did not please them: It was a logo of a turtle shell, emblazoned with the letters DSC.

"Why, that dirty, no-good SOB!" Ducky exclaimed. "I recognize that logo anywhere! That's Devan Shell's so-called 'construction company!' How DARE he try to knock over our tavern?!!"

"You should have learned by now that Devan will stop at nothing to erradicate all of us from the face of the universe, don't you?" Elias questioned. "The real question is... how did he manage to find people of his own kind smart enough to operate heavy machinary?"

"Who knows and who cares?!" Ducky shouted. "Someone has to teach that turtle a lesson he'll never forget! Nobody, and I mean NOBODY, messes with my tavern and gets away with it!"

"Count me in, too!" Elias stated. "He's not going to get away with trying to destroy our hangout!"

"Believe me, Elias... all of us will make sure of that," stated Ducky, "because this time... it's personal!"

---------------------

Elias FF-- Rabbit on a mission!

Originally posted by Elias FF
(OoC: Happy, 4I? I used Jack instead of Flash.)

Thankee thankee.

PAGE CLAIM

.. IN THE NAME OF DIRTY SOCKS

Devan? Aii!

Acid looked very cross. "Devan? That stinking son of a-" the sound of a crash outside interruped Acid, and taking everyone's attention. There was another crash sound. There was a mad dash for the door, to see what the noise was. When they got outside, it was an impressive sight.

The building next to the War Tavern was HUGE, even before all the foundations were in place. Turtles were walking around with construction materials, looking at floor plans, and building. The group of animals didn't see what the noise was, until they heard it for the third time. One part of the building was virtually falling in on itself, with a very scared-looking turtle inside it. The crash was head every time the metal frame bent and smashed another wall. The other turtles starting looking up at that area, groaned, and began walking towards it. This left the rest of the buiding vacant. Foo's face spread into a grin, and he bounded off towards the vacant area. Acid, Phish and Electrik ran after him, trying to get him to stop. Foo scrambled up a few floors, then screeched and jumped, slamming down on the floor beneath him with full force. The floor groaned with the effort of staying upright after a rabbit had slammed himself down on it, and started curving. Foo screeched again, and ran in a random direction, bashing into a pole and bending it. Things went on in the same way, every time the rabbit tried to run, he caused another buiding part to start falling apart, and with each new collision, the rabbit grew more panicked.

Meanwhile...

Devan preformed the turtle equivalent of snapping his fingers. "Eureka! That's it!" he cried, then ran off to find his yellow #1 Henchlizard, who turned out to be asleep.
"#1 Henchlizard!" cried Devan, pulling all the covers off of the bed. "Wake up! Assemble the construction team! I have a failproof scheme to defeat Jazz once and for all!"
The #1 Henchlizard didn't say all of other Devan's schemes had been "failproof", too. He didn't say they had failed. He didn't praise his boss's intellect. But he did rub the sleep out of his eyes and mutter "oog gla durb?" in a a confused manner.
Devan was inperturbed. He grabbed the cup of coffee #1 Henchlizard kept by his bedside and poored it over the unfortunate animal's head, which did suceed in causing the normal level of consciousness.
"Quickly! Assemble the construction team!" Devan repeated.
The #1 Henchlizard (now referred to as #1 for abbreviation's sake) groaned. "Boss, they've got a job. They're building some sort of complex where you work things. Or something."
"What?!" Devan cried, angrilly. "Who DARES hire my construction team when I need them to help me take over the world?!"
"Well, he called himself..." said #1, pausing for dramatic effect, "Scorpi-CEO."(1)


(1): Scorpi-CEO: n
1. A bizarre mutated being caused by the CEO of some company being infected by Ben-Class Scorpions, until they merge into a single living being which walks like a man, looks like a man crossed with a scorpion, and doesn't smell too good, either.
2. A common hallucination.

THE SCORPION KING!!!!! AHHH!
A common hallucination. Yeah.

whoops, I forgot Foo was still in that thingy downstairs. Just pretend he ended the game.

Okay then.

Jack suddenly appeared next to Acid, and Firefox beside Jack. The two of them looked skywards toward the peak of the structure, and then Jack asked, "What's this all about then?"
Acid cocked an eyebrow at the white rabbit. "You mean you haven't heard already? Devan and his cronies are building some kind of office building or some stupid thing like that, and they want to buy the WT's property so they can knock it down!"
Firefox appeared stunned, but not for long. "You've gotta be kidding me."
"Yeah. I'm kidding, and that building there doesn't really exist."
Jack chuckled. "It won't for long... C'mon, Firefox, we've got us some wreckin' to do!"
With that, the two took off towards the base of the structure, guns out and ready.
However, just before they reached the building's unfinished bottom floors, two heavily-built figures, with long, arcing tails curving up and over their heads, appeared in front of them, stopping them in their tracks. "We can't let you go any farther. Scorpi-CEO's orders."
Jack was about to scream something in protest, but Firefox spoke first. "Scorpi-CEO? That poison-tailed pig?"
"I will dismiss your derisive language regarding our Scorpi-CEO; however, the order still stands. You are to go no further."
"Oh yeah?" blazed Jack. "Just try and stop me!"
"No!" Firefox tried to keep Jack from firing on the Scorp-Goonie, making an unwise attempt to push Jack's gun away. "Jack, don't--!"
However, strong as Firefox was, Jack was not about to be stopped. He raised his gun, and pointed it directly at one of the Scorp-Goonies' heads. From that range, coupled with Jack's amazing marksmanship, it was nearly impossible to miss...
But Jack didn't even get an opportunity to fire. Faster than any eye could see, the other Scorp-Goonie's tail flicked over his shoulder and caught Jack on his neck, just between his shoulder and his jaw, with the pointed, venomed tip. Jack stumbled backwards, tripped, and fell heavily to the ground.
"No!" Firefox rushed to Jack's side, and lifted the white rabbit's head off the ground. "Jack!"
It was easy for him to see that the poisoned hole that the Scorp-Goonie's tail had left on Jack's neck was indeed poisonous, and the area around it began to swell. When Jack opened his eyes to Firefox, they were hazy and clouded. "Fire..."
"Jack... I'll get... you... no... just..."
Firefox was rapidly running out of time, and he knew it. The pin-sized hole that the poison barb had left had begun to bleed, and Firefox knew immediately that the blood issuing from the wound was not in good health, from its overly bright-red tinge. Jack's eyes were becoming more misty by the second, and his eyelids began to droop. Firefox, finally having run out of ideas, hauled Jack up bodily and carried him back to the Tavern; if he was lucky, he might be able to get some medical help for his friend there.
He wasn't lucky.

On entry to the Tavern, which he had initiated by kicking the semi-open door in lightly, Firefox saw several armed turtles evacuating the patrons of the Tavern who had not yet left. One of them turned around to see what was the source of the noise, and saw the Captain standing in the doorway, with Jack slumped over his shoulder like a carpet.
The turtle was obviously not impressed. "Hey! I thought I said 'everybody out, this place is being bought out by DSC!' Are you friggin' deaf?"
Firefox, startled slightly by the appearance of this gruff turtle inside the rabbit-based War Tavern, stuttered as he tried to form a sentence. "But... my... he... the..."
"Bluh, bluh, bluh, shut up! Shut up and get out, now! Y'hear me?"
Firefox immediately stopped. No one, especially not a turtle, ordered Captain Jaycen Firefox around like a common peasant.
No one.
Setting Jack's limp form down in a small booth near the entrance of the bar, Firefox glared at the turtle, who just as strongly glared back. "Whaddaya think you're doing? Get out, now!"
Firefox's entire body began to quiver with boundless blood rage, as he growled out, "You near killed my partner, and my best friend... jeez, he's practically my brother, after all we've been through. Now, I'm going to repay the favour."
"What the--?"
Firefox took two long strides towards the menacing turtle, placing them less than six inches apart. The turtle stared down at Firefox with fire in his eyes, but the stolid rabbit didn't back down in the least. The two's eyes remained aggressive as they attempted to stare each other down.
Suddenly, without warning, Firefox's fist came flying forward at the turtle's chest. It hit with such force that the turtle's shell, normally able to withstand even super-high pressures, broke apart, and long, jagged cracks radiated from the point where Firefox's fist struck. Not surprisingly, the turtle was killed on the spot, by one enraged punch to just the right place from the Captain's open hand.
Two of the other turtles turned when they heard the loud crack of their comrade's shell breaking, and their eyes fell upon the red rabbit, standing stock still and breathing heavily as the muscled and armed turtle keeled over, dead. They both raised their blasters at him, but Firefox was already right in front of them. He dispatched one of the two with a quick, open-handed uppercut to the chin, instantly breaking his neck; then, he spun around, whipping out his green blastgun, and spared no time in slaying the other with a single, two-barreled blast to the chest. They both fell to the ground, two limp heaps, as Firefox dodged out the door again, snatching the unconscious Jack out of his chair, and bolting away at full speed from the 'Tavern. Maybe, if he was lucky, he would be able to find help for Jack back in one of the nearby cities.
Firefox hoped, for Jack's sake, that he would be lucky this time.

Ooh. Sounds like it hurt.
I think they'll just ... miss me. You know, don't see me.

BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ suddenly woke up from a stand in a random corner of the tavern, having been tired of selling tournament trinkets. He looked around lackadaisically, trying to figure out what was happening. From what he could tell, he could see Turtles pushing out people and threatening them, evacuating them from the tavern....

BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ: Hey... wait one danged second here...
*BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ twitched, then his eyes filled with much rage*
BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ: THOSE ARE MY FRIGGEN CUSTOMERS!!!! WHAT THE *BEEP* BEEPITY* BEEP* BEEP* AND YOUR MOM *BEEP* *BEEP* *BEEP* BEEP*!...

*BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ then looked over at a Microwave sitting on one of the tavern tables, making the beeping noises, and yanked it outta the wall*

BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ: where was I...

Turtle Henchman 1: Wot's it matter ta you, buddy? Dis place here has t'be cleared out for da new... watsa ya call em... Apartment Complex's!

BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ:What?!?! And take MY business?

Turtle Henchman 2: Whatever. The point is your supposed to get out of here.

Turtle Henchman 3: Don't make us call for backup.

*BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ's face then turned into an all-knowing grin, walking up to the menacing turtle*

BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ(low-scratchy voice): You ever play those RPG games with the storekeepers? you ever attack one?

Turtle Henchman 1: Er... ya...

BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ(lsv): And when you do, they boast about how they ripped you off, then bust out these mean spells, big weapons, and are nearly unkillable?

*long pause*

BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ: That'd be ME !

BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ then reached from his back sheath, swinging his Kaiser Blade as he pulled it out, followed by a large *FZZT* as it melted through the low-class turtle security, while occupying his left hand with his Platinum Pistol, quickly searching for a target...

=[TH3]Turtle Henchman 3 (on radio to) DSC Security Room=
TH3: HQ, HQ, DO YOU READ?
HQ: Loud and clear, what's the problem?
TH3: We get MULTIPLE HOSTILES! One Fled out the door after taking out some of our men, the other is still resisting!
HQ: Alright, setting an intercept course for the fleeing hostile and sending backup. Still copy?
TH3: Yes, Send them fast befo- *SCCCCCCCFZZZTTT*
HQ: Hello? Hello? GRRRR... Dang it... they don't make expendable goons like they used to...
=======

The tavern was in a ruckus, as Turtles were pursuing hostiles.

Ducky could be seen waving around her admin shtick, smacking many turtles asunder, yelling something about making a Turtleshell table.

Spaztic pulled out a keg from behind the counter and started drowning them in B33R, claiming to Bapitize them in the name of Shibby.

Some other taverners was beating up turtles, but they were kind of saddened because they're hits lacked the cool sound effect notations because BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ doesn't know what they are (*cough* post action sequences *cough* *cough* ).

BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ looked around, and finally spotted the tavern door, with an evil grin.

BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ: Hey Guys! I need some people to help nail up some boards on the entrance! I got a plan....

==============================================
Eh, short returning post, so sue me

Meanwhile...

"FOO! GET OFF OF THERE!!!"
"AIIIEEEE!" WHUMP. Foo was still going at it, and the building had somewhat transformed into something like a video game level.
A turtle tried to get rid of Foo, but a swinging beam pulverized it. Foo smashed into a bucket of concrete, showering the contents onto a group of workers on a lunch break. Acid shook his head, doubting they would be desirable as statues. He also knew that he would have to get Foo out of there himself, Foo was having too much trouble on his own. He wound up for a powerful leap onto the building, when a heavy object bowled him over.
"EH?!?" Acid quickly got up, finding the heavy object to be the corpse of a turtle, with a black scorch mark on its stomach. He heard sounds of zapping and Thwapping from the Tavern.
Foo, meanwhile, fell off the building. Landing with a WUMPH noise, he quickly popped up again. "Ashid, what wash taht noishe from teh War Tavern?"
"I don't know. Let's see what's going on."
The four rabbits Acid, Electrik, Phish and Foo walked over and poked their heads into the tavern to see what was going on...



Nice to have you back, BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ!

Sweet. I think I'll have Firefox stand out for a reasonable amount of time before he returns to wreak some more havoc.

The nearest city to the site of the War Tavern, as of the most recent complete rearrangement of all Carrotian landmarks, was a (rather blue) place named - unoriginally enough - "Bunnyburrow".
Bunnyburrow was known for being primarily a burrow - that is, instead of the more common normal city, a series of underground tunnels and caverns - only with more advanced technology then you find in most holes in the ground. There were rumors Bunnyburrow had originally been a secret turtle base, only the rabbits had taken it, but this was widely disregarded as demeaning rabbitarian intelligence.
As is often the way with old places with lots of technology, few really remembered how much of the various machines houses in Bunnyburrow worked, fewer cared to tell anyone else, and even less hung around long enough to listen. It was not really widely regarded at all, which was strange, as it had the potential to become quite a popular place, but the rabbits living inside it enjoyed quite an easy life, what with the automatic food processors, machines which always produced a strange liquid that was almost (but not quite) completely unlike tea, and a strange economic system which had totally abolished the use of money.
If you have not already guessed as much, it was Bunnyburrow Firefox brought Jack to, though it was unlikely he had it - or any paticular city - in mind beforehand. Bunnyburrow was often known to redirect nearby travellers towards it.
If you had guessed as much, this is still what happened.

This post was sent to me via PM by GenEX, who is banned from the board and thus unable to post it himself:

"Oh geez, that was just stupid. A cardboard standup? What's it doing in there anyway?" GenEX asked the vaultkeeper.
"It was supposed to be used for an April Fools Day joke. But we forgot to get it out. So sorry about that, sir." Replied the vaultkeeper.
"Well, next time, try something funny and not scary. Or I may end up destroying everything in a 30 mile radius accidently." And with that, GenEX left the storage house. Even though there was no actual house. Which is why he ended up back in the War Tavern, due to the sheer unreality of the situation.
"This old place.. I haven't been here in a while. Although I was just here a few hours ago. Something tells me both statements are true. Freaky..." GenEX thought. Apparently a lot had happened.
Checking the Tavern's computer, he found out that it had been completely messed up with really pathetic programs and too many really lame Jazz Jackrabbit levels and tilesets. He wondered if one of his alter egos was responsible, and recalled all of them back to his body. In the next room, there was a poster on the wall that had a lot of ugly scribbles on it and fancy text. Somebody really needed art lessons. It said:
F-ZERO TYPE OF RACE WITH WEAPONS AND STUFF. BUILD A CAR, ENTER, AND WIN SOMETHING.
GenEX guessed that things were obviously getting rather boring around here without him and the omnipotent behemoths that constantly attempted to kill him. But, due to lack of pretty much anything else to do, GenEX went to work on an F-Zero car.
Meanwhile, BOB_ALLEN filled up the hard drive with more useless junk. How he got in there is unknown.

(Ultra-special time that is not mentioned)

GenEX was currently designing his vehicle for the race, unaware of what the other taverners were doing. He was trying to set some limits to how much stuff his futuristic car would have, otherwise it'd be very much unfair. GenEX finally decided on what it would be equipped with and began the paint job. A rusty vinegar cow suddenly appeared out of nowhere and landed outside the room where he was working. His car was quite a piece of work. It had a fairly efficient engine that could exceed the maximum velocity of the Blue Falcon, an ion cannon and energy flail as weaponry, could ram other vehicles with taking too much damage, and was a very sleek and shiny red color.
Then he heard some PC Speaker-like sounds coming from nearby. Hurrying in to see what was going on, GenEX found himself in the middle of a fight between the Taverners and a bunch of turtles. The taverners lacked a decent sound card and were making the noises.
"Arg, I despise that sound system! Begone!" And with the snap of his fingers, the sound restrictions disappeared from the tavern. Not too far away, the rusty vinegar cow started weird sounds .
"OH MY GOSHISH! ISSA BIG FIGHETY!" exclaimed Foo. But acid, electric, and phish didn't need him to tell them that. The last time they checked, their eyes were working normally. "Time to bust some turtle heads..." said Acid in a Terminatorish voice. Foo, being the foo that he is, got a hammer and started breaking the heads of the dead turtles, during which he began to collect the "SILLAY PUTTYEY" he found inside. The battle raged on, and other stuff happened not mentioned here.
{/GenEX}

/me twitches.

...Is this GenEX's first attempt at writing something sensible in the WT?

Anyway, Tales needs a comeback. The story was progressing so nicely, and then it just died. I would write it right here and now, but I'm slightly... er... incapacitated.

Spaztic fell out of the machine with a sudden bang.

"What happened?" he gasped. But no one else was in the room. He rubbed his head, it had been bruised. He walked out of the room and into the main tavern. It was completely empty.

"Where is everyone?" he said. Nothing. He coughed and walked over and examined every room he knew of. Nothing again. Just to make sure he wasn't dreaming, Spaztic pinched himself...

..which woke him up.

He was laying on the ground staring upwards towards the center of a circle of faces. "He's awake, he's awake, it's alright," said one of them.

"What happened?" Spaztic gasped once again, this time with an answer.

"You totally passed out from teh b33r man," replied BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ, helping him up. Spaztic suddenly staggered backwards and was caught by another. His head ached and he noticed his shirt was drenched with what appeared to be vomit. He suddenly burst into laughter.

"Rock on. I must have had the best time." Spaztic walked back to the counter to see what was going on. He liked this place already...

Alright! Tales is finally back!

I would write something, but I'm going to go to work in about five minutes, so it would be rushed and crap-tacular at best.

Fun revival.

And then the thread starts dying again... ¬_¬

Comeon! Someone write something!

"Dude, I so got the 101st post. Free drinks all around!"

Dukki, wearing a bright pink lei, poured everyone glasses of mulled wine and ginger ale.

And so, the Tavern began to return to normal, for the time being. Everyone was happily drinking to their victory over the turtles, and Foo made a fortune selling his "SILLAY PUTTYEY" to Spaztic. However, not everyone was happy...

"Dang it, that wasn't supposed to happen!" roared Devan, slamming his fist onto his desk.
"Well, you couldn't have expected the rabbits to just surrender the tavern-" began Devan's secretary, but he was interrupted by Devan's roaring.
"OF COURSE NOT, BUT THEY WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO WIN!!! How did they destroy all of those tuf turtles?!" Devan slumped back into his chair. "Argh, I hope I can get some actually intelligent beings to help me, I'm tired of losing because of my slow-witted army!"
"So, you want some people who can actually put together a decent plan and follow it? I think we can fill that..."
Devan and his secretary turned towards the new speaker...

Firefox stuck his head into the Tavern, and was immediately not noticed. He looked around for a few seconds, shrugged, and slid up to the bar, taking a seat on one of the few barstools still open for a seat.
Ducky nodded to Firefox. "Hey. How's Jack faring?"
"He's stable. Fortunately. The good doctors at Bunnyburrow are keeping him around for the time being, though; something really weird happened on the way there, and they want to keep a close eye on him."
Ducky raised an eyebrow. "Oh? What happened?"
"I have no idea. They didn't seem too displeased with it, though, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed that he's not going to wake up dead one morning."
Ducky grinned, presented him with his mulled wine and ginger ale, and puttered off into the back for a few minutes. Firefox took a long drought of the stuff, and clunked the glass back onto the bar, smiling to himself. "Mmm, good stuff you make, Ducky," he said to no one in particular.
On a whim, he propelled himself sideways, and spun contentedly on the barstool for a few seconds. The room whirled around him, and he could hear some amused snickering from those beside and around him as he rotated. As his head began to loll from side to side from the dizziness, he slowed himself to a halt again, and amused the rabbits around him further with a slightly disoriented "Stop the room, please, I want to get off."
Taking a few moments to shake off the waves of dizzy nausea that fell through him, he shook his head to clear his vision. As soon as he had, however, he wished he hadn't...

(Author's note: I'm not proud of this at all.)

Devan looked the intruder up and down slowly, as you might study a plum at the market before giving up and applying the "squeeze" test. It seemed to be an elderly woodpecker, standing about 4'2" with high heels. The bird - possibly a mutant - wore glasses atop his heavily powdered beak, the same color as his enormous satin dressing gown, which was decorated with green dragons swallowing the tails of orange dragons.
"And who might you be?" asked Devan, menacingly, reaching slowly for his gun.
"It all depends on when." said the woodpecker, "In the year 4045, for example, I was the second director for Jurassic Park Something or Other, hired only after my predecsesor was eaten by a dinosaur. Unfortunately, I lost that job after foolishly hiring an individual by the name of Vampyra Smurferama, sent to me via Cognomail from the War Tavern. After that, I returned to a few years ago, on the planet Tubelectric, where I was hailed king by the strange race of the Ostrich Peeps."
"The Ostrich Peeps?" asked Devan, surprised. "I thought the nuclear meltdown had seen the last of that interfering species."
"No, they retreated to the barren, uninhabited sector of Tubelectric, there awaiting their new leader to fall from the skies. And this I did. My first failure as their king came about two years ago, when a group of idiots who called themselves "Taverners" escaped from Ostrich Prison and devoured many of the Ostrich Police. The situation, as was presented to me recently, is that I must lead the Ostrich Peeps into some military victory before the month is out, or they shall dethrone me with a blowtorch. I have come to lend the Ostrich Peep Militia to your revenge against the Taverners."
"Well....." said Devan, slowly, "I don't know..."
"They can do song and dance numbers!"
"Deal."

... as he saw the ceiling of the tavern. No one saw it but him, as they were all still looking at him, and he was the only one shaking his head (except Foo, of course). The ceiling had cracks on it from some damage done there (all those people dropping through the roof?) and was about to collapsel. Then, after rubbing the dust falling from the cracks from his eyes, he looked back. The cracks were straining... and the roof, with a meldramatic crash, fell in.

(Sorry, four-eye. I felt this wasn't a time to introduce my own characters.)

EDIT- whoops, this was for directly after 41's post. Unknown beat me.

([voice=drone]oh goodie a chain story.........[/voice])
Suddenly, Ducktape monsters came in and wrapped everyone (except Devan) up like mummies. soon after many turtles, working for Devan come in and capture all the wrapped bodies."Here you go for your good deed." Says Devan giving the Ducktape leader $100 (or around 110 euros).

...

Ducky came out of the back room to find her tavern empty, devoid of all life, and with a large section of the roof resting on the ground. She simply stood in the doorway for a few moments, jaw hanging open in shock. "What in all good..."
She advanced slowly, silently, and cautiously, looking around. All that was left of the previous joviality were the mugs of drink, in every level of fill. She blinked a few times, looking around again, and vaulted over the bar to investigate further.
She yelped in surprise as she fell over almost immediately after landing, and she landed on her backside with a loud "Oof.!" Shaking off the sudden adrenaline boost and ruefully rubbing her bum, she stood up again, only to almost fall over again as she slipped on whatever the object had been that she had tripped on the first time. Hastily withdrawing her foot from it to avoid another arseplant, she looked down to see what it was.
Firefox's blaster.
She couldn't believe her eyes. Firefox had left his blaster behind in the Tavern, and on the floor, no less. No Captain, especially not Firefox, would just forget about his blaster, even in a Tavern, where inebriated solidarity was the rule.
It quickly fell into place. Whatever had happened to the inhabitants of her Tavern, it was not by their own will. They were taken away by force. But by who, and to where, and why, were all still mysteries to the good tavernkeeper.
She picked up the green blastgun, and looked it over once. This was definitely the trademark weapon of Captain Firefox, no doubt about that. Looking around again, a dark grimace on her face, she cocked the weapon, like she had seen the Captain do once before.
Carrying the gun nonchalantly in her taut fist, she strode to the door, making a mental note that her feet seemed to be adhering -- only slightly, but definitely enough to be noticeable -- to the floor. She opened the door, none too gently, and looked outside, hoping that she'd be able to get a glimpse of her Tavern's patrons' captors.
Then she saw it. A faint, dull glint, like sunlight off of duct tape, off in the distance. Then it was gone.
She nodded, satisfied, and flipped Firefox's gun from one hand to the other. She muttered something, half to the empty Tavern, and was gone, after whatever it was that had robbed her peaceful haven of its inhabitants.

(its duck tape not duct tape, this one is special because it quacks!)
While Ducky was looking at the sunset, a voice said "Better duck, dude!" and a turtle suddenly grabs her and suddenly Devan arises out of the corner
"I always knew someone would come to find this out." He says "Take her away!" and so the turtles towed her away like the rest, but Devan didn't notice someone on the roof, a black rabbit with a blue vest and black pants. "Hmmmmmmmmmmm Devan and his goons are up to something I'd better follow him, Quitely that is." He says.

Down the road to the tavern, no five minutes after Ducky left, two figures approached. A blue fox and a black bird, walking... no... going down the sidewalk, not humming a cheerfull tune involving hi-ho or anything stupid like that. As they neared the Tavern they stopped, and turned in unison. A snatch of conversation could be heard from nearby bushes where nothing, sadly, lurked. "I heard the ads too. I know it has historical value. But that is no reason to go there, and loose time off a job. Rogue mages don't hunt themselves, ya'know." "But it won't take much time. I mean, this new job does have a generous time frame. It's not like anyone will capture him before then." "... alright. Lets go in." With that the duo went into the building, and looked around. The first thing that striked them- the damage. The second- the lack of people. The third- the apparent power-outage. "Wow, this place really is history."

Edit- ... Gecko, I still cannot get what you are saying.

(My point is after they took everyone, Devan decided to stay along with a few of his goons to see if there was anyone coming or survivors were in the building and thus left us at my last post)
"This place is history" says the black bird.
"Definatly is" says the black rabbit suddenly opening the door.
"who are you?" says the blue rabbit and bird.

The fox (NOT RABBIT! NOT RABBIT!) fingered his laser rifle, and, as a second thought, got into the right position to get his sword out quickly. He glanced at the bird, who nodded.

*has to go to his character archives to find a few that haven't been used yet*

Maxwell Vermilion, better known as Curvegrinder, was an expert skateboarder. He spent the majority of his time on his plank, practicing and busting unbelieveable maneuvers. His friends knew that, more than a good percentage of the time, they would be able to find him at his favourite hangout, the Mindless Montezuma skate park in the northern part of the Myriad Metropolis.
So it was, then, that a good friend of his turned up to find him.
"Max!" Cory Montgomery, alias Justice, shouted the young leveret's name as soon as he caught sight of him halfway up a quarter pipe. This caused him to fall backwards off of his skateboard, and the board flew upward, coming down with a loud clunk onto the lip of the ramp.
Curvegrinder rubbed the back of his head, wincing as his fingers traced over a fresh lump. "Oog... Don't call me that, man, it's Grinder, remember?"
"This is serious stuff, M-- Grinder. I spent the last five or ten minutes trying to find you." Justice almost tripped a few times as he made his way down the side of the quarter pipe, and extended his metal right arm to help the fallen leveret up.
"What is it?" Grinder asked, coming up easily. "What happened, man? You looked seriously freaked."
"Some turtles and weird friggin' tape monster things just kidnapped your uncle and my cousin. They were at the WT, and then boom, turtles all over the place. Everyone got took out in tape."
Grinder's expression went from smug to shocked in nothing flat. "You're not kidding. You're kidding... no, you're serious, right?"
"Would I lie to you? Don't answer that. Come on, man, do you have time to doubt me? Jay and Mike are being carted off by Devan's goonies!"
(Author's note: Jay and Mike are Jaycen Firefox and Michael Indigo, respectively. Justice just calls them that.)
Grinder's mouth fell open. "We've gotta get going then! I'm not going to let those turtles do anything to my uncle!"
He was up to the lip of the ramp in a flash to retrieve his skateboard, and he swung it a few times, as if it were a club. "I'm in the mood to kill something now... what say we make it some reptiles?"
Justice grinned darkly, and flexed his metal fingers. "That's a big ol' ten-four, buddy. I'm up for some shell-squashing."
"Then let's go! Operation Rescue People is underway!" Curvegrinder yelled out to the air around him, and was off at a dead run. Justice was not far behind.

And I was hoping this would be a story thread without too much nonsense, but Gecko came and ruined it. Argh.



Shortly after being deposited into a prison cell, Acid woke up. Finding that he was unable to move, he decided to call for help. "!" it was then Acid realised he was covered, head to foot, except for a few small openings for his eyes and nose, with tape. A few seconds later, the tape started quacking, and waddled off somewhere. "Fools, they should know better than to use duck tape. Duct tape is what they want," Acid muttered, looking around his cell. Aside from the rest of the taverners and the duck tapes, the cell was completely empty.
Spaztic chose that moment to wake everyone else up by screaming, "THEY TOOK MY SILLAY PUTTYEY!!!"

Batty blinked dramatically before rising to his feet. Duck tapes flew in every direction, quacking, bouncing off the walls, and generally behaving like toons until the effect of having touched BB wore off. In this time, Batty had observed their surroundings, found the most logical explanation, and made a comment.
"So... we're in a prison."
Spaztic threw himself at the bars energetically. "Yes! And we must get out! For Iceland and my precious!"
"Whoa, whoa, calm down." said Acid, swatting at a duck tape which was trying to adopt his leg. He turned to Gen. "Has anything like this ever happened before?"
Gen beamed. Finally, his wisdom was being appreciated! "Yes, the War Taverners have been thrown in jail before. The Ostrich Police threw us all in for borrowing a car, but we got revenge!"
"And how did you get out?"
"Oh, well, I was going to use my mind to get us out, but we were rescued at the last moment."
Acid looked interested. "By whom?"
"Him." said Gen simply, pointing at BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ, who was slumbering in the corner. Unwoken by Spaztic's scream of loss, he was lost in some dream of money and beer. None of the Taverners had quite the heart to wake him.

Since it was clear that the mysterious black rabbit wasn't going to do anything but dramatically lurk in the shadows, the fox and bird walked out of the building. The fox said "Whatever, I should get back on the job." The bird responded with "So, where will we be going?" "Well, last time I heard the mage we are tracking was working with the Duck Tape cult, so.... we should just go to where the Duck tape cult is based." "... Duck Tape cult?" "Duck Tape cult. We should be able to get past their Duck Tape monsters. Comeon', we need to go. I'll lead, you follow behind, and be quiet." With that the fox started to run down the path and the bird, as he flew behind, vanished.

"Finally, something is going my way! Well, sure, I just gave a complete stranger $100, but otherwise, my plans are coming together!"
"A random duck tape and sophisticated bird creatures are part of your plan?"
"Yes! Er, I mean no, but it all works out the same. The duck tape got rid of the taverners, and the birds are giving me the intelligence I need from an army! How is the demolition coming, by the way?"
"Not very well. We have removed all furniture and stuff from the building, but a group of tuf turtles couldn't find out how to use the bulldozers and wrecking balls and..."
"Both the machinery and my offices are rubble now, I presume."
"Well, yes, but at least they didn't destroy half of the offices."
"That's good, then. Go and get the bird leader, tell him to demolish the tavern. I can't trust my own goons anymore..."
"They seemed to be doing well with the construction of the offices..."
"That was mostly the lizards. And lizards are tricky. I can never tell whether any of them are really on my side. I thought I told you to GO!"
"Y-yes, sir!"

The elderly woodpecker (let's call him "Artemis") stepped through the doorway into the Tavern. Despite the lack of inhabitants, the door had managed to get itself blown inward again, so there was little difficulty in doing this.
The building was impressive. So, this is where they all came from... thought Artemis, noticing what appeared to be a cherry table running the bar. Speedy and GenEX and the irish rabbit and all the rest... oh yes, and Tyf.
Tyf.
Why does that name make me feel strange? She had been somewhat beautiful, but one sees a lot of attractive women when they're a director of a sure-to-be-big-hit-movie, so...
so...
Tyf.
Artemis' reverie was interrupted when a drawling voice interrupted his reverie. "Sorry to interrupt your reverie..." it drawled, interrupting his reverie, "but I'm just a bit curious what you're doing here."
Artemis whirled, scanning the shadows for the source of the drawling voice which had interrupted his reverie. "Who's there?!"
A black rabbit stepped from one of the countless dark corners provided by the War Tavern free of charge. Unlike many of his species, he was clothed, and leisurely spun a small blue handgun. "One who is not yet important to the storyline. Now, I've got a handgun, and while your beak is rather effective on trees, I doubt it's going to be much use against a sentient being, so why don't you just answer my first question?"

Artemis nodded slowly; he had dealt with this kind before. This black rabbit was the hero of his own personal life drama, had infinite cool, and probably believed himself immortal. The best method of dealing with them was to play along. And he did have a gun.
"I'm... ah... surveying this building for anything of monetary or historical importance, before it gets demolished by the Ostrich Peeps of Tubelectric."

The black rabbit grinned slowly; he had dealt with this kind before. This woodpecker was a stereotypical wise old man, had sufficent power to deal with no-threat interlopers, and probably believed that the black rabbit was unaware of the woodpecker's connection with the Ostrich Peeps. The best way of dealing with them was to take utter control without them noticing. I do have a gun, of course.
"I'm sure you are. And have the Ostrich Peeps let you know why this curiously designed building is so empty and ready to be demolished?"

Artemis sighed. Was this black rabbit trying to get on his nerves? "Well, no, I hadn't been informed. Did they not simply get bored of these surroundings?"

The black rabbit sighed. Was this old woodpecker trying to be useless? "Ah, and that's where you're wrong, my friend. It seems the Duck Tape Army captured the entire population and took them to Devan's jail cells."

Artemis remained calm. So the Taverners were gone - could only make it easier to demolish the empty building. But... jail cells... entire population... "...was one called Tyf taken with them?"

The black rabbit outwardly remained calm, despite inwardly gloating. Evidently this hired thug had a weakness among the Taverners, making it child's play to halt the demolition plans. Tyf, eh?
"Oh, indeed. Took everyone, as I said. Was she the one crying out for her savior...?"

Artemis groaned and raced out of the building, slapping a few bills into the black rabbit's paw. Turning to the assembled Ostrich Peeps, he began to outline the plan. "Ok, listen up, everyone! Devan's been before us and captured the Taverners, robbing us of our military victory! I vote we get our revenge against him for this treachery. Who's with me?!"
There was a rousing chorus of ostrich noises, and the army began returning to base.

The black rabbit grinned and looked around the building again. One threat down, maybe two if the Ostrich Peeps were good fighters. Now, who were those strange creatures stealing his color scheme a while back...?

The fox stopped in front of a building. The building was dark, gloomy, and so obviously the stronghold of a cult it was depressing. He walked to a window (draped in black masking tape!) and looked inside. The halls were crawling with guards (quacking! how can tape quack?), but none of them saw the fox (who would use such stupid guards?). Then, signalling behind him, the fox faded away. A minuit later a nearby door opened and closed itself. In the next room, the dust, thick layers of dust accumulated in the years since the cleaning staff died, was parted by invisible footsteps. At the jail cell block holding the Taverners, a few minuits later, the door swung open. Noone stood in the doorway, and noting could be heard save a slight flapping noise, inaudible in the ominous creak of the door's hinges.

*is eventually going to write more on Justice and Curvegrinder... sometime*